What I’m thinking about as I start my 43rd rotation around the sun: mortality (always mortality), kindness, patience, love, creating.

I had a splendid day with lovely messages from friends, and Spence always makes the event fun and funny. I started the day with an early morning jog. I’ve been getting better about pushing myself out of bed between 5 a.m. and 5:15 a.m. to go on a 20-25 minute run. I knew I wanted to start my 43rd year in that way and so I did. (I’ve also kicked both dogs out of the bed, so I’m sleeping much better and waking up much easier. The dogs are in crates in the bedroom.) There is saying I like: One day you will not be able to run. Today is not that day. I think about that when I don’t want to get out and moving. Movement, pushing myself, is my gift to myself. The body is meant for motion.

Next week I am meeting with our new chaplain to talk about spirituality and helping people. I’ve met her twice for other reasons and liked her immediately. After reading “Barking to the Choir” and listening to OnBeing podcasts with Rev. James Martin and journalist Pico Iyer, I’ve decided I want to talk out ideas with someone who has chosen to follow such a path. I’m particularly interested in talking about generosity of spirit and how to maintain that equanimity in a variety of situations. It’s great that I can be of good cheer when I’m surrounded by people I enjoy, work I enjoy, etc., but what about when I wake in a bad mood (not much of a morning person, generally), or someone pisses me off, or treats me poorly (or I perceive it as such) etc. etc. How does one maintain equanimity while also dealing with the situation at hand (without being walked over). It seems like those are all basic human experiences and some handle it with such grace and others not so much. The Dalai Lama, Thich Nhat Hanh, Pope Francis, Father Greg, Rev. Martin—they demonstrate an equanimity I strive for, but as a layperson, one who doesn’t spend my days ministering to people and reading religious texts and meditating—how can I bring that more into my life?

I also like how they, particularly Father Greg, ground their practice in the concrete—in relationships and reaching out to people and listening to people—rather than in the supernatural. Father Greg describes a relationship with god and the practice of the gospel in concrete terms, in how one lives her life now, without consideration for an afterlife. Of course, he has his own faith and understanding of what happens after death, but for someone like me, who is secular and of the earth (one of my favorite quotes by Thich That Hath: “The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly alive.”), it makes Father Greg’s book resonate even more strongly with the likes of me.

Lastly, I really want to start making things. Like, from scratch, with my hands. The complication is I’m not that skilled with drawing. I briefly looked at etching, but the printing process is totally cumbersome (I’m looking to do something at  home) and the etchings are basically incredible drawings that are then inked and printed. I can be a bit ridiculous in these ideas. Like when I decided to start practicing the clarinet again (something I’m thinking of doing again, by the way, with a tutor) and decided, Hey! I want to play like John Coltrane, and so I bought a book of John Coltrane songs, and realized, Oh, most of his songs are improvisations…so they aren’t written out. Because John Coltrane was a genius who played whatever the hell he wanted. Same concept with etchings. Hey, maybe I’ll try etchings. Yeah, no. BUT I am going to try block printing, which is a bit more accessible and can be use for more abstract designs. We’ll see. I’m sure I’ll be sharing work here if there is anything worth sharing.